Thursday, August 16, 2012

NRL 2012 Round 24: The Raiders Roll On


It has been a rough middle period for Canberra Appreciation Month, as the offical MEBCAM President (me) had his email, blog, Facebook page and motherfucking Twitter accounts hacked by some douche-canoe (most likely some jealous bastard from Sydney who envies his capital-dwelling peers for their good looks, charm and awesome views of trees).  As a result, my Canberra Appreciation has been confined to me climbing to the top of Telstra Tower and yelling “How good is Canberra?  Fucking brilliant, really!  The other day I drove around for two hours and didn’t get shot at!” and “There’s like eight entrances to Cooleman Court!  How fucking good is that?” and other excellent examples of why Canberra is so tops.  I think everyone in Canberra agreed with me – at least, I couldn’t hear anyone saying otherwise. 

So despite the attention of Julian Assange’s Internet Pirates, the blog must go on.  I can’t let Skynet control me.  Hopefully full MEBCAM access will be restored soon.

And the Canberra Raiders are shit-hot right now.  Hot enough that the other day I considered taking off my jumper.  But I didn’t; they’re not THAT hot.

Upset of the round will be the Panthers to sink a very unstable Warriors team.  Everything else should happen as per the program.  If it doesn’t, I’m going to punch some people (most likely professional rugby league players) right in the junk.

Brisbane Broncos vs Melbourne Storm
Bulldogs vs Wests Tigers
Sharks vs South Sydney Rabbitohs
New Zealand Warriors vs Penrith Panthers
Gold Coast Titans vs Parramatta Eels
Manly Sea Eagles vs Newcastle Knights
St George-Illawarra Dragons vs North Queensland Cowboys

GAME OF THE ROUND
Canberra Raiders vs Sydney Roosters

There’s absolutely no question here.  The The Mighty Glorious Canberra Motherfucking Raiders produced a great start to Canberra Appreciation Month at the start of the month, producing arguably their best game of the season to defeat the Brisbane Show Ponies.  The Green Machine produced fireworks on the field, which no doubt confused the Brisbane players with bright lights and loud noises.  They played so well that I wished I’d actually tipped them, instead of just pretending to.

And then they gave Penrith a royal Brett-Stewart-touch-up last week, somehow keeping their slim finals chances alive.  This week shouldn’t provide anything except a training run for the Green Machine, as the Roosters will be the speed bump to the Raiders… um… car, I guess.  I am no good with metaphors.  Or corkscrews. 

Reasons I don't play NRL #291: I don't like being kicked in the balls

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