Saturday, April 28, 2012

Welcome home, Todd Carney!

A special thanks to “Anonymous” who left a lovely message in the comments section last week:  Hey MEB, Will you be holding a banner/sign at next weeks game at Berra Stadium? I would love to hear your suggestions of interesting & amusing slogans the crowd should use in the theme of your mate Todd.

My sign, as always, reads “Play better, Raiders.”  I’ve had that sign since 1995, and I just know that one day they will read it and heed its advice.

This week though, in honour of our prodigal son, Todd Carney, who will be returning with the Sharkies to take on the might of the Green Machine, I am organising the “Carney Army” to take up section 42 (or wherever I decide to park my arse for the day).  We are loyal Carney supporters, and we show this by setting fire to the spectators in the rows in front of us and extinguishing the flames with our piss.   

From Friday night's Bulldogs v Manly game, the security staff stopped fans bringing in any banners about Des Hasler.  I'm assuming that the Canberra guards may do a similar thing (but probably not).  In any case, they may take our banners, but they'll never take our Todd Songs:

Our Favourite Player

Toddy's our favourite player
Whichever logo’s on his back.
We don’t care who he plays for
As long as he’s got new tatts.

Carney's our favourite player
If he wears the six or one.
Or if he’s pissing on my leg
Or setting fire to my bum.

Todd Carney's our favourite player
He really is a gem
He loves a drink and a drink and a drink and a drink and a drink
Please give him the Dally M!

Carn Carney

Carn Carney, carn you good thing! 
Carn Carney, kick for your right wing!
Carn Carney, run fast and run far!
Carn Carney, let’s see you drive a car.

Carn Carney, carn you good thing!
Carn Carney, this is what we sing.
Carn Carney, tell us all what you’ve learned.
Carn Carney, let's go to Goulburn.


Todd Carney is a sight to see
When he plays the game.
Todd Carney is a sight to see
Trying to sign his name.

Todd Carney loves to kick the ball
And play for brand new teams.
We’re all wondering who he’ll pick
Next year in 2013. 


Todd Carney drives players in tackles
Todd Carney drives the ball when he kicks
Todd Carney drives cars into phone stores
And takes camera phone shots of his dick.


We love you Todd Carney forever
Regardless of your club
And because you've been banned from driving (three times)
We'll take you to the pub. 

Words and music by Mister Evil Breakfast

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Bravo on the tunes MEB. I feel very special that my comment got posted about. I feel like I got a special mention from a famous person. :)