Mister Tipvil Breakfast - NRL round 3

This photo was taken moments after Julian O'Neil checked into his room at the Crown Casino

This tipping thing is hard work, man. Seriously. Hard. Work. Teams this year seem to have the consistency of a glass of orange juice. However, I will soldier on and tip some winners this week. In fact, I'm so confident in my success that I've sold my kidneys to get up a decent amount to gamble with. And by "my kidneys," I mean "my collection of other people's kidneys." I'm not even missing them, I don't know why everyone makes such a song-and-dance about it when I cut them open.

Tigers vs Roosters
What? Are both of these teams seriously playing each other? They're just going to stand around for 80 minutes and laugh about how easy it was to beat the Raiders. I hate both of these teams. Roosters by 10.

Titans vs Bulldogs
It's the CLASH OF THE TITANS... and the Bulldogs. I'm pretty sure the Titans haven't impressed me much this year; I think they won when I didn't tip them and lost when I did. As a result, they have annoyed me way too much, and I am hereby saying (possibly for the first time in my life): GO BULLDOGS. I feel dirty.

Warriors vs Broncos
Can anyone beat the mighty New Zealanders? Probably, but it's not going to be the Broncs, who are in trouble with the NRL and the RPSCA for shaving a gorilla and making him play football. We're onto you, Toni Carroll. PS. You have a girl's name. Warriors by 14.

Eels vs Raiders
Very clever work by the Raiders in both rounds so far to get beaten and lull the rest of the competition into a false sense of security. Will they continue the "let's pretend to play really badly" ploy, or will they actually turn up this week? Time will tell. Raiders by about 870 (trust me on this one, Kranky).

Cowboys vs Storm
Ummmmmmmmmmmm... Cowboys.

Rabbits vs Knights
The Bunnies kind of disappointed me a little bit last week by not winning. They won't want to feel my furrowed brow being pointed in their general direction two weeks in a row, so they should gee up a bit and play some decent footy for Round 3. The Knights on the other hand, managed to beat Cronulla but lost all of their players to injury (including one bloke who had his entire leg ripped off) in doing so. It's like spending all your rent money on milk and cereal and then discovering that you're lactose intolerant. So yeah, Rabbits to win this in a canter.

Dragons vs Sharks
God, I just don't care. Sharks.

Manly vs Panthers
Neither side is doing much for anyone so far this year... it depends if Manly decide to turn up to this one. They should win, but I might actually tip the upset for this one - I'll bet two Tazos that Penrith notch up their first win for 2009.

Good luck for Round Three, and remember - get busy tipping or get busy sipping!