Friday, April 26, 2013

NRL 2013 Round 7: Sweeping up the Anzac crumbs


The ANZAC Test and City vs Country match last weekend gave a well-earned couple of days off for punters and shitty blog writers (or both!), with Australia skipping away with a win on Friday night against the Kiwis, and… nope, fucked if I know who won on Sunday.  

The New Zealanders looked into it up to their earholes in the first half, and had a couple of things gone their way could have taken a lead after the first 40 minutes.  However, a quick visit by Steve Denk in the sheds gave the Australians a bit of a boost, and they put on about a thousand points in the second to take home the trophy (if there was one).  

From watching the match on Friday night, it dawned on me that there’s probably a few dickheads wearing the green and gold who are there because they had a good year in 2007, or were touted as “future Kangaroo captains” when they were seventeen, and not because they deserve to represent their country.  

Jon Thurston needs to have a good, hard look (and laugh) at himself.  His form for the Cowboys has been poor lately, and his Australian form even worse.  If the Kiwis could have put a full-strength team together (any team with Shaun Kenny-Dowell in it is never going to be full-strength), Thursty might have been shown up worse than he was.

Justin Hodges is still eighteen shades of rubbish.  How the hell other teams haven’t worked out that he isn’t going to pass the ball unless he’s absolutely positive that he isn’t going to score is beyond me.  Just tackle the fucking fuck.

The phrase “Greg Bird, Australian representative” makes me laugh until I realise that it’s a true thing, and then I can’t stop crying.  I know Australia has a reputation of putting some “hard men” in the second row to be “enforcers” or some such bullsh!t, but can’t we find some enforcing hard blokes who aren’t complete fucking numpties to fill the slot?  

Darius Boyd isn’t entirely a dickhead, or even underperforming… but surely there are other wingers in the comp who are just plain better that Darius?  Nathan Merritt comes to mind.  Actually, anyone not called Darius comes to mind.

FUCKWIT WATCH 

Canberran day-time night-club goers were shocked to see former Raiders player Josh Dugan allegedly involved in an alleged assault following an alleged verbal stoush whilst allegedly drinking at the alleged wake of an alleged friend, as reports are unconfirmed that anyone would actually be Dugan’s friend.  The incident has left the alleged victim with a broken eye socket, but he is allegedly not pressing charges due to the alleged payout that Dugan gave him to shut the fuck up.  Allegedly, St George are reconsidering their offer to recruit the former Origin rep, but have allegedly said, “Fuck, we really don’t have a choice, do we?”  

Round 7 games 

There have been some sleepless nights lately – nothing to do with this week’s NRL games, just a bout of insomnia.  But that’s not to say that a few of this week’s games aren’t harder to pick than a new tattoo on Josh Dugan – none moreso than the top(ish) of the table clash between the Bunnies and the Manlies.  I’ve opted for the Bunnies – not only do I quite like them, I quite dislike the Sea Eagles.  As long as Geoff Toovey is involved, I will never be a fan.  And Daly Chery-Evans has a haircut that is at least twice as stupid as his name.  

Sydney Roosters vs St George Illawarra Dragons
Melbourne Storm vs New Zealand Warriors
Manly Sea Eagles vs South Sydney Rabbitohs 
Wests Tigers vs Brisbane Broncos 
Gold Coast Titans vs Newcastle Knights 
Cronulla Sharks vs Canterbury Bulldogs 
Penrith Panthers vs Parramatta Eels 

GAME OF THE ROUND 

Nth Queensland Cowboys vs Canberra Raiders 

I’m going to cross my lime-green fingers that the Cowboys continue to be terrible, and that the Raiders continue to opt to lead a match around about the 80th minute mark.  The Canberra lads don’t have the greatest track record up in sunny Townsville, but if there’s a point in time to turn things around, it might as well be this week, right?  Right.  

Right.

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