HOLY SHIT I’ve just come down from my State of Origin II high (or SOOIIH, if you’re into your acronyms [and I know you are]) - it was a great game of fooseball, and made up for the disappointment that was State of Origin I. It had everything a league fan could ever want; Billy Slater having a shit game AND getting injured, NSW winning, a guy called Cronk got sent off, NSW didn’t lose, the chick who sang the national anthem was super hot, QLD didn’t win, Jonathan Thurston didn’t play well enough to even think about sleeping with his team-mates’ wives, and QLD lost.
It may not have been the most convincing victory in the history of victories – that trophy still belongs to anyone anywhere who has ever won anything else – but it was enough to knock a toothless smile from every Queensland supporter all over Australia. Sure, the good Morris brother’s try was a bit lucky, considering Jarryd Hayne dropped the ball but was fortunate enough to have his foot accidentally connect with it (or, as the commentators described it, “Had the presence of mind to acknowledge that he had to keep the ball alive, so chipped ahead and set up a perfect bounce for his centre three-quarter to run onto and out-pace Greg Inglis to score in the corner”), and Queensland bombed a thousand opportunities (or “chose not to score at that opportune moment”), but it was a well-deserved win in any case.
And fuck it, we got to see Billy Slater play another shocker in representative colours, and loosen his child-size Tarzan-grip on the No.1 jersey. Bring on Game 3, biznatches!
It was good of Akuila Uate to entertain the crowd before the match
NRL Round 15
It’s another tricky one this week, and a lot of results will depend on which superduper Origin stars decide to turn up to work for the weekend. I’m opting for the Doggies to take down the Dragons, because I’m sick of tipping the Dragons and being disappointed. What the hell happened to you guys?
Another all-Queensland battle is on betwixt the Cowboys and the Broncos this week, with slack jaws being the order of the night. My prediction – Dairy Farmers Stadium will be drowned in spit, and the Cowbs will hang on for a win. Hell, Thurston had a night off on Wednesday night; he should be fit to go.
St George-Illawarra Dragons vs Bulldogs
North Queensland Cowboys vs Brisbane Broncos
Sharks vs New Zealand Warriors
Parramatta Eels vs South Sydney Rabbitohs
Gold Coast Titans vs Penrith Panthers
Wests Tigers vs Sydney Roosters
Manly Sea Eagles vs Melbourne Storm
Game of the Round:
Just relax and think back to the awesome Raiders victory of last week. It has kept me warm this week, which is handy because my heating has been shut off due to me betting all of my money on them to lose.