Raiders vs Tigers
RAIDERS RAIDERS WOOO! This game should be an absolute fucking nut buster (I’m planning on busting three) and will no doubt have the people of the nation’s capital suffering heart attacks, sweaty palms and busted nuts. The Tiges have either been asked to invent reasons why they might not play (injuries, births, Bieber fever) or they are going to have to ask their mascot to take up position in the second row.
Whatever the case may be, the Raiders will roll another big cat on their way to the Granny. Mark my words. Mark them.
Roosters vs Penrith
It honestly doesn’t matter who wins this game, because they’ll lose next week anyway. For what it is worth, my money’s resting on the Chooks to get up, despite them being incredibly rubbish in last week’s hard-fought (read: lucky) win against the Tigersers. They missed a billion tackles and gave up almost 2000 metres, yet somehow came away with the points. Like the Tiges, the Panthers don’t have the strike power to make them pay for their turnstile defence, and somehow, somehow, the Bok Bok Boks (that’s a chicken noise, for anyone playing along at home) will live to fight another day.
It's not quite rugby league, but it's good enough for me
If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my tips.