Friday, August 08, 2014

NRL 2014 Round 22: Three years eh?

Hmmm.  Did you know that at the end of the year,Craig Bellamy will be the only coach in the NRL to have been at the same clubsince 2011?  Did you know that 2011 was only three years ago? 

Here’s a list of other things that happened in 2011:
  • Amy Winehouse died.
  • Charlie Sheen went fucking nuts.
  • Katy Perry and Russell Brand got divorced.
  • There was an earthquake in Japan that fucked up the Fukushima Nuclear Plant.
  • Beyonce got pregnant.
  • The final Harry Potter movie was released.
  • Downton Abbey was popular.
  • Osama bin Laden and Kim Jong-Il died. 
  • That “Occupy Wall Street” movement started.  And ended.
  • NASA concluded its space shuttle program.
  • Manly beat the Warriors in the NRL Grand Final.  Holy shit, I remember that.  Holy shit, I should remember that - it was only three fucking years ago!

It might just be me, but I find it fucking weird that coaches switch clubs more often than Geoff Toovey changes tampons.  If a player had the lack of loyalty that coaches do (Sonny Bill, I’m looking at you, you overrated fuck), the fans wouldn’t have a bar of it.  How then, are the players supposed to play under a different structure, with different ideas, with new teammates and new police officers every few years and still perform to a high standard?  Sure, they should be able to catch a ball, tackle a player and not piss into their own face, but let’s be honest – these are rugby league players we’re dealing with.  It’s all colour and movement to most of these blokes.  And urine. 

Round 22:

I’m opting for the Manly people to beat the South Sydney people, just because I don’t trust Souths at the moment.  This is their chance to impress me.

The Doggies surely have enough spark to get out of their current slump and get up over the Broncos.  Surely they can.  It’s the Broncos!  Piece of piss.

Everyone is still underestimating the Panthers, which is weird, cause they’ve been top of the table for most of the year, and there’s about four rounds to go.  Maybe they’re not as shit as we thought?  (but maybe they are)

South Sydney Rabbitohs vs Manly Sea Eagles
Brisbane Broncos vs Canterbury Bulldogs
Newcastle Knights vs Melbourne Storm
Nth Queensland Cowboys vs Wests Tigers
St George Illawarra vs Penrith Panthers
New Zealand Warriors vs Cronulla Sharks
Sydney Roosters vs Gold Coast Titans

Game of the Round:

Parramatta Eels vs Canberra Raiders

To keep Canberra off the bottom of the ladder, the Sharks need to lose by less than twenty, and the Raiders need to only lost by 30 to remain in second last place.  Yes, that is what it has come down to. 

I was almost going to tip the Raiders (I’d had a bit to drink) and then remembered that they lost three of their best players last week, including the only bloke on the team who knows how to tackle.  If someone doesn’t step up into Fensom’s regular-sized shoe, we’re going to be in trouble.

Fuck it, we’re in trouble anyway.

Even Rugby League computer games know how it feels.  Here is Alan Tongue and Jarrod Croker's love child feeling sad

No comments: