NRL 2018 - Round 15

So we sit here in our lull between Origin matches, making do with regular games and awaiting the next alleged assault by a league star – preferably in a nightclub – and instead we have to put up with retirements.  This week, Peter Wallace handed in his boots for good, while Darius Boyd announced to nobody in particular that he was giving up representative football. 

Darius’ retirement was about as significant as if I rang Dominos Pizza on a Friday night to announce “Nothing for me tonight thanks.  I’m cooking schnitzels!” 

At least now old man Boyd can concentrate on spending the rest of his contact (four more years) at the Broncos trying to regrow his hamstrings and avoiding physical contact.  Hmmm.  Maybe Darius is smarter than I give him credit for.

Round 15

Parramatta Eels vs South Sydney Rabbitohs

Well fuck me, Parramatta notched up a win last week. Well done to them. I'm sure the memories of beating the 2018 Cowboys will keep them warm at night.

North Queensland Cowboys vs NZ Warriors

Our Kiwi brethren found some form last week in giving Manly a wee thumping. They will change things up this week by fucken desmolishing the Cows.

Sydney City Roosters vs Penrith Panthers

I still don't rate the Roosters and I'm not even sorry about it.

Canterbury Bulldogs vs Gold Coast Titans

Other than the obvious "Who fucking cares?" this game will raise very few questions and provide even fewer answers.

St George Dragons vs Manly Sea Eagles

Hopefully the Dragons can reclaim some of their early season form, because there are not many things better than seeing Manly take a good beating.

Cronulla Sharkies vs Brisbane Gronks

I hope the stadium gets hit by asteroids and they call the game off, to be honest. There aren't too many more unlikeable teams than these two packs of arseholes. Uuuh go Sharks.

Newcastle Knights vs Melbourne Storm

I'll take the obvious route here and say "go stroms" but I'm about as confident as Michael J Fox eating soup.

Wests Tigers vs Stupid Fucking Raiders

The Tigers are sitting in 9^th spot, with a for and against of +1. The Raiders are sitting in 10^th spot with a for and against of 0. This game will likely be a one-point thriller, with a final score of 1-0. 

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