The commentary on the Lympics has been pretty good thus far, with only a handful of fuck-ups from that guy who normally does the AFL and Wipeout, and Grant Hackett has done an exemplary job of pretending to be someone with a personality.
But there are a handful of events that even past competitors can't really help out in. Captain Expert competed in the luge in nineteen-dickety-two, and he seemed to run out of ways to describe the event.
Regarding Frederich Scholl of Germany: “Look at his position here; he’s really quiet in the sled and is really pushing through the corners.”
And this, about Nigel Zoduku, the Nigerian competitor: “He’s really pushing through the corners and is so quiet in the sled.”
One of these people won gold, and one of these people competed in an old shopping trolley. I did not witness either of them screaming (as mentioned above, they were both “quiet in the sled”) which is probably a good start for someone taking up the luge; there’s nothing as disconcerting as an athlete who closes his eyes, yells for a while and asks someone to “tell them when it’s over.”
My “Go Aus” moment du jour came the other night when Eddie kept throwing back to the “controversial” ice-skating/dancing/whatever pairing from Russia, who opted to dance an Aboriginal-themed performance . Ed went on about how rude it was for the Russki’s to be ripping off ‘our’ culture, then blasted the Swiss team for dancing in a Bollywood style, followed by an attack on the US pair for doing the famous Spanish dance, the tango. I’m glad that Australia is so proud of their Aboriginal culture to try and protect it like this. I’m also glad that the land down under didn’t have anyone in the finals, or we’d be treading on some toes by performing the Nutbush.